Day 328, Friday, November 28th
[It's weird, to end up at a home that's not home. He's spent more time there than anywhere else this year, but that says more about his transience than anything. If told five years ago he would live such a lifestyle, he'd have believed that, but not the part about most of those multiple places being not just six but seven, eight figure abodes.
And yet it's Jessica's home (still probably the nicest one he'd lived in as an adult, before Ash swept in) they're doing Thanksgiving in. Maybe it's a fear of being upstaged on her part if it's in such a house; such a naive thought is, while unvoiced, just more proof of Ash's suspicions, that Max's mind is on something, something Ash had likely been trying to put his mind on for months. Because with even half of his braincells to put to it, he'd suspect the worst sooner.
It's not until they're pulling up to the house and there are two other cars there that he remembers the hell of Thanksgiving is not only family, but family you don't normally have to see. And thanks to Michael, Jessica's family is still his family.
And their ride is a taxi. It's not like they can turn around. Though Michael coming out to greet them right away in a hurried excitement would've made it impossible in anything.]
...Maybe she decided to start investing in cars. But not especially good ones. To be more undercover. As a journalist.
Day 375, Friday, December 14th
And yet it's Jessica's home (still probably the nicest one he'd lived in as an adult, before Ash swept in) they're doing Thanksgiving in. Maybe it's a fear of being upstaged on her part if it's in such a house; such a naive thought is, while unvoiced, just more proof of Ash's suspicions, that Max's mind is on something, something Ash had likely been trying to put his mind on for months. Because with even half of his braincells to put to it, he'd suspect the worst sooner.
It's not until they're pulling up to the house and there are two other cars there that he remembers the hell of Thanksgiving is not only family, but family you don't normally have to see. And thanks to Michael, Jessica's family is still his family.
And their ride is a taxi. It's not like they can turn around. Though Michael coming out to greet them right away in a hurried excitement would've made it impossible in anything.]
...Maybe she decided to start investing in cars. But not especially good ones. To be more undercover. As a journalist.
Day 375, Friday, December 14th
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Sighing, Ash uses his hand as a prop for his hand and looks out the window. ]
Don't be dense. I'll just say it one more time: if you don't want anything to do with them, I'm the last person who thinks you have to overlook everything because they're family, but if it's because you know how well I'd go over, don't let that hold back. I don't play like I'm the kind of person you take home to mom and dad.
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[ He doesn't bother turning around to face Max. It's not something the older man can get mad about because he knew what kind of person Ash was when they started to date. He knew there wouldn't be the normal trajectory. ]
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Let it go. It never had anything to do with you.
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But, he won't push Max on this. There are a lot of things he's pushing back on now, but Ash's opinion of himself isn't something he'll force down anyone's throat.
It's hardly 'winning' the argument, but Ash drops the topic. Max seems to have several reasons for avoiding his family but should Ash be the last reason to remain, he now knows he has permission to pretend he doesn't exist for the day. ]
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He just has to deal with people raping him. He just has to deal with Blanca. He just has to let Ash deal with everything alone in Chicago. The alternative is Ash leaves. Like he intended to do with Eiji; Eiji gets to keep him to some degree because he's a good boy who won't rock the boat or actually ask for anything. And sometimes Ash'll just leave because he doesn't wanna be at the house or because he wants to be with someone else for a while. But he'll probably come back, so there's that.
The only way anything might change Ash's mind is by just continuing to pick him over anything and anyone else. Maybe eventually it'll get through. Probably not, but that's just something he'll have to deal with too. He's the one who blew his own credibility on loving him or any of that.
Back to the house. He mentally places a bet with himself, with 40-60 odds about whether Ash will leave for a while over this too.]
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Yet, he made a promise. He'll give his all this time and then, if it leaves him with nothing left, he'll have nothing left, and it's over. His half-ass attempts and issues meant things started and stopped between them too often until only a mess was left. Blanca pointed out the actions he took for Ash when he fully expected rejection and while Ash isn't Blanca, he can do at least that much for a man he claims to love.
His lack of Blanca-ness does, unfortunately, mean he isn't perfect. Ash himself is messy.
Once they're in the L.A. house, Ash greets the kitten. He'll need to prep this house for them, too. ]
Is there anything you need from the New York place?
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No. When should I start worrying if you're not back?
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[Bet won?]
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[Pretend it's all normal again. Pretend he's not surprised Ash isn't blowing out for a day or two.]
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There's a lot to do. A lot of responsible to be. But, their life isn't going to be enjoyable if Ash keeps trying to get through the days focusing only on what needs to be done. ]
We never got a chance to really do that RV trip.
[ The cats are fine for now, too. They were also packed for travel. ]
Our last hike got interrupted, too. I liked the trials here.
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[ Says the boy who assumes he's made it as far in life as he'll manage. ]
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[But he's already pulling a foot up onto a chair to tighten the laces a little, as if to make sure his shoes are set for hiking. He isn't someone who wears different shoes for different activities unless it's work boots in a garage.]
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[ Ash doesn't ask his size. He doesn't need to. ]
But since I'm handling that, stocking the RV is up to you.
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[ To prove his point, Ash heavily lands his weight on the couch. ]
I think we should order alcohol and sit out back instead.
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[ That does fit in with their rapid timeline. ]
Then grab some bottles. I'll get a fire started.
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[ Ash didn't skimp out on the food. ]
So we'll finish the night celebrating in a way that's more like us and then order breakfast in bed tomorrow.
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