Day 328, Friday, November 28th

[papalobo]

[It's weird, to end up at a home that's not home. He's spent more time there than anywhere else this year, but that says more about his transience than anything. If told five years ago he would live such a lifestyle, he'd have believed that, but not the part about most of those multiple places being not just six but seven, eight figure abodes.

And yet it's Jessica's home (still probably the nicest one he'd lived in as an adult, before Ash swept in) they're doing Thanksgiving in. Maybe it's a fear of being upstaged on her part if it's in such a house; such a naive thought is, while unvoiced, just more proof of Ash's suspicions, that Max's mind is on something, something Ash had likely been trying to put his mind on for months. Because with even half of his braincells to put to it, he'd suspect the worst sooner.

It's not until they're pulling up to the house and there are two other cars there that he remembers the hell of Thanksgiving is not only family, but family you don't normally have to see. And thanks to Michael, Jessica's family is still his family.


And their ride is a taxi. It's not like they can turn around. Though Michael coming out to greet them right away in a hurried excitement would've made it impossible in anything.]

...Maybe she decided to start investing in cars. But not especially good ones. To be more undercover. As a journalist.

Day 375, Friday, December 14th

Comments

[papalobo]

Why would you think about anyone who'd have some kinda shit with you?

[Already, he's too tired to be mad and yelling again.]

[jadedlynx]

He's your old man. Maybe he's not worth a place in your head, but if it's about dating me, it's easy enough to ignore that part when you're with him.

[papalobo]

[Max's eyes shift to Ash before letting out a sigh and starting to look for a place to pull over.]

[jadedlynx]

What are you doing?

[ Why do they need to pull over? Max is capable of speaking and driving at the same time. ]

[papalobo]

It's dangerous enough to fight you when I'm not directing a three ton steel and gas bomb seventy miles an hour down a roadway, and I'm about to hit you in your stupid-ass pretty face.

[jadedlynx]

Pull over. I don't want to crash because I knocked out a driver for trying to hit me in the face.

[papalobo]

I'm working on it.

[And he sincerely is. And finally does. The car is in park, it's time to shift the seat back a little. He can't get enough 'sweep' area on the right, so he starts rolling his left shoulder, preparing a fist.]

[jadedlynx]

[ Earlier, he was the first, and only, person who bragged about Max's achievements. Now, as he waits for the warm-up, Ash doesn't seem very impressed. ]

[papalobo]

[Though it's none of the day's bragging that stops him. Instead, it's a flashback, now that they're back in California, a stinging memory of those words: Eat better my ass. Not something you're thinking about now, huh? and then of a Christmas Eve choking. In the end his fist drops, defeated.

He really had planned on hitting him. He supposes he has to think of this as 'growth' or 'maturation' or something. It just feels like giving up. Blanca's face flashes too. It's enough flashbacks he almost expects a nice war scene or another Griff to round it out, but as he shifts the seat back into place, ready to drive again, there's just plain old dry reality, in which there's not really anything he can do but take whatever the hell Ash wants to go through.]

You win again.

[jadedlynx]

[ This was a stupid waste of five minutes. Why is there a winner or a loser when they're both in agreement? The confusion on Ash's face is so short-lived that it's easy to miss with an ill-time blink.

Sighing, he turns into his seat to face forward. ]

That was dumb.

[ Just so Max knows. ]

It's not like I was going to cry myself to sleep. What was all of that about?

[papalobo]

It doesn't matter what it was about.

[He's too tired to argue about it. He has driving to do.]

[jadedlynx]

[ It's a tone that's almost as familiar as Max's default voice, now.

Sighing, Ash uses his hand as a prop for his hand and looks out the window. ]

Don't be dense. I'll just say it one more time: if you don't want anything to do with them, I'm the last person who thinks you have to overlook everything because they're family, but if it's because you know how well I'd go over, don't let that hold back. I don't play like I'm the kind of person you take home to mom and dad.

[papalobo]

Guess I lost the credit to get mad about it anymore.

[jadedlynx]

Lost the credit?

[ He doesn't bother turning around to face Max. It's not something the older man can get mad about because he knew what kind of person Ash was when they started to date. He knew there wouldn't be the normal trajectory. ]

[papalobo]

[He considers answering that, making a face at the road before giving that up, too.]

Let it go. It never had anything to do with you.

[jadedlynx]

[ Ash is near-impossible to convince even when someone tries their best and so, something that half-hearted won't even have the impact of a faint breeze. He's sure they both know it is related to him... perhaps only as one factor of many, but a factor nonetheless.

But, he won't push Max on this. There are a lot of things he's pushing back on now, but Ash's opinion of himself isn't something he'll force down anyone's throat.

It's hardly 'winning' the argument, but Ash drops the topic. Max seems to have several reasons for avoiding his family but should Ash be the last reason to remain, he now knows he has permission to pretend he doesn't exist for the day. ]

[papalobo]

[Running of to Texas drained him of any right to ask when he'd ever picked anyone over Ash, what the hell ever gave him the impression he wouldn't bother to go meet with someone just to punch them in the face for thinking of the brat half as badly as Ash did himself. Not handling his latest rape the right way should've been the last straw, but somehow, someway, he'd figured out--too late to earn any good boy points for it but soon enough the last straw didn't quite hit the pile---he was going to lose him over it.

He just has to deal with people raping him. He just has to deal with Blanca. He just has to let Ash deal with everything alone in Chicago. The alternative is Ash leaves. Like he intended to do with Eiji; Eiji gets to keep him to some degree because he's a good boy who won't rock the boat or actually ask for anything. And sometimes Ash'll just leave because he doesn't wanna be at the house or because he wants to be with someone else for a while. But he'll probably come back, so there's that.

The only way anything might change Ash's mind is by just continuing to pick him over anything and anyone else. Maybe eventually it'll get through. Probably not, but that's just something he'll have to deal with too. He's the one who blew his own credibility on loving him or any of that.

Back to the house. He mentally places a bet with himself, with 40-60 odds about whether Ash will leave for a while over this too.]

[jadedlynx]

[ It'd be an insulting analyzes if Ash were able to read his mind, but as much of it as he'd argue, his tendency to leave isn't something he can deny. Ash's reasoning varies from Max's perception, but his actions are nevertheless the same.

Yet, he made a promise. He'll give his all this time and then, if it leaves him with nothing left, he'll have nothing left, and it's over. His half-ass attempts and issues meant things started and stopped between them too often until only a mess was left. Blanca pointed out the actions he took for Ash when he fully expected rejection and while Ash isn't Blanca, he can do at least that much for a man he claims to love.

His lack of Blanca-ness does, unfortunately, mean he isn't perfect. Ash himself is messy.

Once they're in the L.A. house, Ash greets the kitten. He'll need to prep this house for them, too. ]

Is there anything you need from the New York place?

[papalobo]

[Ah shit. Bet lost. He is going. He had 60 on stay, it wasn't like this was a big blow up, he culled it in time, he thought. ]

No. When should I start worrying if you're not back?

[jadedlynx]

Since when did I agree to be your assistant? If you needed something, you'd have to grab it. If you don't, we'll just need to get some stuff to stock this place for a month.

[papalobo]

You're not going back for anything...?

[Bet won?]

[jadedlynx]

I'm not the one who might've left any work unfinished.

[papalobo]

We're in a digital age now.

[Pretend it's all normal again. Pretend he's not surprised Ash isn't blowing out for a day or two.]

[jadedlynx]

[ They knew they'd be gone for a few days so he likely brought his laptop with him even just for travel.

There's a lot to do. A lot of responsible to be. But, their life isn't going to be enjoyable if Ash keeps trying to get through the days focusing only on what needs to be done. ]

We never got a chance to really do that RV trip.

[ The cats are fine for now, too. They were also packed for travel. ]

Our last hike got interrupted, too. I liked the trials here.

[papalobo]

We got about the same track record in the woods as we do for holidays, together. You do all right alone on 'em.